00:00:01 Speaker 1: The lake brace was being used as a different kind of brace, right, so, and they were like waiters down around ankles and that sort of thing going on. It's like getting insulted by Mr Rogers. Just because God didn't give you a brain doesn't mean you're not special and unique. I made some poor footwear choices, but you shouldn't bring snake boots, so you will now be able to scream, rolls, UFC fights, reruns of Dog the Bounding Hunter, and porn Hump from anywhere on the property. Good morning, degenerate anglers. Welcome to Bent the Fishing podcast. A recent study found is best consumed while sitting in a lawn chair. I'm Joe Surmelie Miles Nulty, and before we get to the actual show, I just want to say that I freaking love fishing in October. Yeah, rock October so good. But unlike you, I especially loved camping and fishing in October because like everybody's gone, it's quiet. There's just like a little frost on everything. In the morning, the fishing is usually good, but even if it isn't, there's still enough like chill to the air that you can justify pulling out a flask because you're not day drinking. No, no, no, you're just staying warm. You're being responsible, right. And I also I also recently discovered coffee bags from Black Rifle Coffee, which I had never known about before. It's like a tea bag, except you don't have to be British or over the age of seventy to enjoy one. And they're perfect for making a hot cup of coffee, you know, when you're waiting at camp for the sundrise or the fish to bite, or or you just need like a quick warm up and a recharge. They're awesome, man, I had never known about them, coffee bags. They're sweet, British or over the age of seventy. Yeah, uh yeah. So in case you guys missed it, the Bend podcast is fueled by Black Rifle Coffee and uh. As Miles suggested, camping is not really my jam, though, those will come in handy the next time I'm staying in a motel with rooms that can be rented by the hour of the week, would I'll take that over a tent. So that's usually where I end up when I'm on the road, and I'd rather not. I try to avoid the expired coffee packets sitting next to the tiny lime crusted coffee pot by the hair dry I'm talking about, so I know them well. So if you like good coffee like we do, head over to Black Rifle Coffee dot com backslash meat Eater and sign up for their monthly coffee delivery service. So if you ever oversleep and rush to that next Zoom meeting, you can always just pop a bag in your mouth and brew internally bitter while you're there. Over at Black Rifle Coffee, enter the discount code meat Eater at checkout and they will take off your first order, which is a pretty good deal. And you know we're on the subject coffee here, Joe, I got a little fun fact for you. Shoot, you know that Canada drinks more coffee per capita than almost any other country in the world. Okay, true, Canadians average more than a hundred and fifty two leaders per person per year, which the Internet told me works out to about forty gallons, which you know, seems like a lot. And that puts them third in the world behind the Netherlands. In Finland, for all the big coffee chains and ubiquitous hipster cafes that feed our addictions to legal uppers and free WiFi. We Americans barely crack the top ten. We only come in at number nine. Canadians got his beat. Yeah, this doesn't surprise me at all because there's a Tim Horton's every thirty five meters from Canada. This is not shocking. And guess what, Canada, Tim Hortons is overrated. You ever? Do you every knew it? Tim Horton's I have I have is a little disappointed. They think because you get your Canadian bacon, egg and cheese sandwich on a real ceramic dish, it's like classier than dunkin Donuts. It's not. I prefer I prefer my saucer sandwich served without a smile. And more importantly, I like to drink my coffee when it's handed to me because Tim Horton's holding temperature. I swear to god man it's like four thousand degrees celsius. So if I'm in Canada, I get one in the morning and hope I'm ready for a pick me up at lunch because that's when it's drinkable, you know. But they're not gonna get sued over the hot coffee thing like they want over here. Yeah, that's yeah, they yeah, they they're not so soue happy. That is a plus. Uh, But look, we like to josh arown and have a little fun with our neighbors to the north. But you know, you have to admit, in all seriousness, all of our guide friends and lodge owner buddies up there, they're having a really rough go of it this year, you know, and and may well continue to have a rough go as as ice fishing season approaches, because, as we all know, the border between the US and Canada is still closed due to the COVID's so we can't visit, which is a bummer because I love fishing in Canada, and it also means, uh, you know, these guys are experiencing some financial hardship, you know, because we can't go. So for this week's regional fishing report, we thought we'd you know, check in with our buddy and lodge owner Mitch McFly all the way out on Spooner's Lake in Alberta, just this sort of seeing, you know, how he's been holding up through this whole thing either, folks. Mitch McFly here with your weekly fishing report from Pickerel Point lodge on Alberta's pristine Spooner's Lake. Before I get into the fishing, though, we sure to hope you and your family are staying healthy and happy in these hectic times. Particularly our valued guests from the States. We've missed your friendly faces this season. It just hasn't been the same around here without seeing fifteen dirty and mostly broken down cooler stacked outside the doors of our acquaint cottages, or getting those morning calls in the office asking for someone to please bring over a plunger. Anyways, quick bit of housekeeping. Some of our repeat guests may remember, Old Gusts are a long time boat mechanic. We've unfortunately had to lay Old Gusts off for the season because, wouldn't you know it, we didn't have a single lodge boat blower right past the shallow water marker boys and run up on the rocks at Thompson's Cove. Without the constant inflow of props to refurbish and lower units to restore, we just couldn't keep Gus busy, so we sent him home. He has a good sport about it, though, and happy to spend a little bit more time on his true passion carving small wooden bears and moose. Hope to have a pyleum for sale in the gift shop next season. Okay, then, I am happy to announce that the Walleye byte has been better than I have seen it in probably twenty years. Some folks around here say it's due to the lack of fishing pressure, but I think it's because the local anglers go a little slower. We tend to favor a more methodical approach instead of that fast, ratic, circular trolling pattern I know most of you boys from the States rely on. It's like I always tell you, fellows, the hours of eleven am to four thirty PM are not not exactly what i'd call prime time, but you can still find at least a few polite fish to bite in the middle of the day. You know they are a Canadian he Surprisingly, I've caught quite a few forty pike right off the docks this year. I've had a little more time to do some fishing in the evenings because there aren't the thirty to forty crushed bud light can strewn about the property that need rounding up for proper disposal in one of the many many conveniently placed recycling bins. We have on site. A five A diamond spoon has been producing really well for me, and I found it quite relaxing and therapeutic to just cast in reel while I listened to the call of the loons, which aren't completely drowned out by kid rock and that chicken fried song blasting from the picnic tables over at the boat house. I'd also like to mention that, on the bright side, we've been able to spend time improving our operation and beautiful facilities. Based on your feedback, We've loaded up on Mrs butter Worse and will only serve what you folks refer to as that maple sap shit upon request, all of our bag lunches will now include three packets of mayonnaise instead of the usual one. And most importantly, we've upgraded our WiFi so you will now be able to stream those UFC fights, reruns of Dog the Bounty Hunter, and porn Hub from anywhere on the property. Anything we can do to make your stay here more comfortable, we just uh can't wait to have you folks back. We pray that you can return to the serene beauty of Alberta by three or at the very latest, thanks and God bless Canadians are so good at polite insults. It's like an art form up there, man. You know, the Japanese have kabuki, the French have impressionistic painting, Americans have monster truck rallies, and the Canadians can tell you you're an a hole without you even knowing. Now, you're right, You're right, man, It's like getting insulted by Mr Rogers. Just because God didn't give you a brain doesn't mean you're not special and unique. And look, no, I cannot tell the story on this show. Remind me to tell you later about an epic anti Canadian rant I heard delivered on a boat by a Floridian. Of course, of course didn't know the guy he was ranting too was from Canada, right, and dude, it was nasty and and the poor guys follow up in in polite Canadian fashion, was simply, I'm actually Canadian and he just lefted it that and both dudes walked away stunned, and and the rest of the lake trout fishing was really freaking awkward. Um, anyway, I mean, did you know where I'm from? We come out of the womb insulting the doctor out here. Yeah, and which is It's interesting Like when I was the time that I've spent out East, I've always amazed at how much the insults can jack up and jack up and jack up, and like nothing comes of it. Because where I grew up in Hawaii, like we we rarely get to the insult stage before people are already getting punched in the face. We're all like Hawaii, it's like, oh, hey, what's up, what's up? And you're already getting punched Like it's just over. I gotta say, I think I think Canadians have the right idea and that we could we all learn a little something from them. But uh, you know, since we're on the subject of insults and insulting people, I feel like it's time for for us to switch over to this week's smooth moves. Indeed it is, and this is a special one for me personally. I actually recorded this a couple of months back when I was on my annual Upper Delaware River mousing trip with some of my favorite fishing buds up there, and I've I've been going up there every year just to fish at night for about six years now. And when I'm there I always meet up with my good friend and the owner of White Tail Country fly Shop, Joe Demo Daris, and Joe has a hot, sticky, steamy story for us this week, why why, oh my god, this week on Smooth Moves, I'm very happy to be sitting here with my my, my old friend, my dear friend, Joe Dimldaris, who I would consider the grand pubab the Upper Delaware. Would you agree with that? Oh no, okay, well I'm saying you're the godfather of this, Teff. We're actually sitting in Joe's guide shack up here on the river, so it's nice to do an on location with you. This is one of my favorite places. Um, and remind us all how many years guiding you have, uh like three decades? Three decades? And then you told me before we started this that you actually blocked out a lot of things that would have probably made good smooth moves. Uh yeah, I mean yeah, I mean there's there's a slew. I'm not gonna on for hours if I start really like lett him come back to my brain. But um, you know some of the things you just never want to like, make sure you don't remember him. Okay, but you do have one on the tip of the brain for for today. Yes, well I'll give you the Yeah, I'll give you the like the most bizarre one. Okay, okay, okay, So, um end the night's pitch black coming out at this like kind of remote ish makeshift boat launch. Um, we gotta kind of walk a few hundred yards to go get your vehicle, so, you know, let the anchor out. Got a newly wet couple, kind of kind of like a senior citizen, newly wete couple. You know. They weren't like young kids. They were like sixty. She was like maybe forty, but he was. He was in the sixties, retired guy. And um, he was in the back. She's in the front. Get the spot and I'm gonna pull out, put the anchor down. I said, just hank tight. I'm gonna be a little while and gonna walk up, come back, and just don't get out of the boat because just stay there. So um, I go get my truck. I come driving back down through the woods and my boat's gone. And I left the light for him too, because it's really dark. And I had a little like thinky like this take out with your exactly no light and it's a good hike up to get where your trucks. So come back with my truck. It's like no boat. And I looked down river and just on the last bend as are down as I could see the little lights starting to vanish going down the river. I'm like, oh crap, So this was a long time ago. So I run down the bank. I grab a flashlight ahead of my truck. I run down the bank, got this light going, and I catch up to the boat. They're totally oblivious. I'm yelling. They don't even hear me, right, and they're totally oblivious because he had gotten out of the back of the boat went up to the bow, so it shifted the weight and then shifted the weight and lifted the anchor. I didn't have like a lot of scope out because I mean, that wasn't supposed to happen, right, Like, stay at the boat and if it starts floating away, you think you notice. But there was a big preoccupation that was happening that they didn't notice. They were floating away the whole time. And that's because it's like the leg brace was being used as a different kind of brace, right, So and they were like waiters down around ankles and that sort of thing going on, and they were totally oblivious. She was absolutely mortified. He he actually didn't even like it was a big deal. Okay, wait, all right, so they're banging. I'll just say that's what they're doing. Exactly what they're doing. How far out in the like, were they still close to the bank or did they like the way out in the middle. Well, it's not like really the river's wide, but it's not really deep. Maybe uh, I don't know, maybe fifty yards out, forty yards out, okay, you know, And so I go sloshing out and this happened, like I was probably my late thirties early forties when this happened. I mean today I would have just laid, well, there goes the boat. I'll just go get my truck and meet him at the next take out. But but you know, so I grabbed the boat and I dragged it all the way back up river. You know that. The guy's like, well, I'll get out and help you. I'm like, now, just stay there, don't move. But when you waited out and walked up on the boat where they still like like mid mid koitis, No, because when I hit him with this big like flashlight I had in a truck and that got that got her attention, right, and she was like, you know and like kind of cut everything off. So, um, did you guys talk about it? Uh, kind of sort of not really. I don't remember telling you the truth because now I had to hump the boat back up carminum it. You know, it's like this really stinks, um, And and I really kind of felt sorry for her. She was mortified. She really was really really embarrassed, and he wasn't, you know, which was kind of like really odd. So I could tell that was making her more embarrassed, you know, and I kind of felt bad for her. But um, yeah, it was kind of kind of odd. And uh, I never did see them again, So I don't know if they stayed married or not or whatever. I don't really worry about it. Well, God bless him. What a story for later though, that dude still telling that story. Um yeah, I don't know. Probably I think I told my wife the story too, and tried to get her up in the front of the boat one night jump she wasn't manage. Well that's a new one, I mean, man, Like I've heard of clients sneaking off for a little alone time. I've had that, and I've I've heard of anchors slipping and guides losing their boats. I've seen that, But I have never heard of clients copulating so hard that they actually pull the anchor. That's a new one for me. When you're in the mood, you're in the mood. Momos, momos. That's a word we like to use around here for people that execute those kinds of screwups. Moms. Yeah, we don't, we don't use that one out here. I know we have learned that all of you out there listen to podcasts, at least a lot of you, are big fans of shall we call them derogatory words for you, guys love insults, And that's why we love you, because you're all just about insulting people. So we're we're bringing it up. We're bringing up that that theme back at least for one more week. Uh. And here in the Mountain West, we have our own derogatory word for people from elsewhere, and I'm going to define that for you in this week's weekly word. Webster's Dictionary defines fish as this week's word is gaper. A while back, Joe gave you the definition from up here, which is what people in northwest Pennsylvania call city folk from Philly who come up here for the weekend to fish. Well. The East doesn't have a lock on derogatory terms for tourists. One Mountain West sler for flint Landers is gaper, as in someone so dumb struck by the scale of topography and beauty they're seeing they just stand there with their mouth agape, usually stopping traffic, holding up a lift line, or blocking a boat ramp. This term comes from ski culture but has been thoroughly adopted into the fishing scene. When I first moved out to Montana nearly twenty years ago, now I was a complete gaper. I was so constantly in awe of everything around me that I spent a good thirty percent of my time in a mouth breathing trance. I was such a gaper that I had no idea what that word meant, so when people called me a gaper, I didn't know enough to lies they were making fun of me. He doesn't even know. I was officially christened with the nickname Gaper on a backcountry fishing trip with my good friend Matt Dally We had spent most of the day hiking deep into a box canyon, and when we finally got to our riverside campsite, the pool in front of us was boiling with rising trout, some of the biggest I had ever seen at that point in my life. While Daly said about doing what a seasoned fisherman would do, you know, calmly assembling his rod, building his leader, and tying on the appropriate fly, I just stood there, dumbfounded, staring at this horde of trout, sipping mayflies off the surface. Once Dally had finished rigging, slipped into his waiters and laced up his boots, he passed behind me and half yelled Cape Cape, Cape Cape on his way to the pool that broke my reverie. And when he immediately hooked a fish, I started scrambling to put together my own gear to solidify my status as a gaper. I hurried through the rigging and tied a few let's call him questionable knots. When I finally did start fishing, I somehow hooked the biggest fish in the pool, which broke me off on the first run. When my blood not failed, the nickname followed me even after I stopped gaping my way through every Montana season, and I eventually just had to embrace it to this day. Every once in a while, when I'm floating a local river or riding on a local ski hill, I'll hear someone yell out. I'll stop and look around trying to figure out if an acquaintance from the distant past has just recognized me, or there's some random coop in the near vicinity eliciting wrath from a local. So we don't have those kinds of gapers out here in the Northeast though. On the radio like FM Old School, during traffic reports, if there's an accident on the highway, sometimes they will note that there's a gaper delay. They actually call it that. It's called a gaper delay. Gaper delay on that Academy road. So it's gaping. Yeah, So we just gave it other people's misery and bloodshed because they're just there are no mountains, you know. But regardless, you realize that the tens of people listening to this podcast are now going to resurrect that nickname for you. Right, you efficiently sealed your fate to forever be known as gaper. That's all right, I'm sorry, Gaper, I can handle. It's better than being a loser, which is what one of us is going to be. At the end of this next segment, it's time for fish news. Fish news that escalated quickly. Before we get into the meat of fish news, I want to let you guys know about the fishing community actually doing some good in the world. For once, my buddy Josh Mills harnesses the evil of Instagram and leverages it away from the dark side. Josh is running an online auction to help out commit unities that have been devastated by all the big fires out west, called Flies for Fire Relief. It's a it's a really unique fundraiser. It's completely social media based. All the money goes to go fund me pages set up to help individuals and communities who have been hammered by the fires. And I can personally vouch for this as legit. This isn't one of those I r S voicemail scams that I keep getting threatening me with jail time if I don't call them back and give them my social Security number. Yeah, what a great concept to use social media for something that's actually useful. But they're auctioning off rods reels, waiters, boots, guided fishing trips. There's even a first light, kemo pattern lamps and fly reel up for auction. And I mean, I work at meat Eat and I don't even have one of those, so you know me neither. And I'm actually gonna be throwing down a dozen custom Master Splinter mouse flies that I'll be whipping up on the vice. So follow at Mills Fly or follow the hashtag flies for Fire Relief so you don't miss it when my mouse is pop up for grabs. And so far the campaign has already raised more than forty thousand dollars and they are still going, which is amazing. Anyway, Now onto the real fish News, which you all remember is a competition where Myles and I scour the deepest, darkest crevices of the Internet looking for the most interesting nuggets of fish or fishing related news. Um neither of us has any idea what the other is about to say. And at the end of it all, if you guys have been following along, our steamed audio engineer Phil decides who wins and who hangs his head in shame. Lately that's been me. Miles has been on a hot streak. So I'm nervous and my confidence is shaken, especially because you get to lead off this week. So you should be nervous, Joe. You should because I'm starting out this week. Read about where I left off last week, which worked out well for me. Okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna revisit the invasive carp files. Man. You just love a carp, Man, you just suit I do. I actually do. I love and hate them. And that's all wrapped up into into this package here. Last week I schooled everyone about the dangers of feral goldfish. Goldfisher, carp and carp in their various forms, are arguably the most destructive aquatic invasive species in North America. Well, this week, the state of Wisconsin issued its first arrest for the illegal sale of Asian carp. But before I get into the details of all that, I feel like I gotta provide a little bit of context. Some of you will know that, some of you won't, but it's important. Asian carp is a catch all term that refers to several different carp species, including bighead, silver and grass carp. These fish were brought here from China in the sixties and seventies for a whole bunch of different reasons. But as so often happens in these situations, they escaped and they invaded local waters and they've been spreading ever since. They're now in twenty eight states and still going. You've probably seen footage of the thousands of silver carp flying out of the water when boats passed by and people like hitting them with clubs and arrows and all that. That that's been pretty well, pretty well covered. Uh, And most of that comes from places like the Illinois River that have been just totally overrun by these fish. And just so you guys understand what we're talking about, these fish can consume forty percent of their body weight per day in aquatic nutrients, and in some waterways, asian carp now make up more than nine of the total biomass, and they just pushed anything else out. Yeah, I mean, it's insane. The amount of like ninety of the bio of the fish, of all the biomass, everything that lives in a waterway are now asian carp. It's it's mind blowing. Yeah. And I'll just I'll just throw in there, like you used to see a lot of those videos the jumping carp in the bow, fishermen and stuff, and just because you don't see that many anymore, it's not because they've gone away, Like like you said, they are just pushing further and further. You know, up, it's it's it's crazy. Yeah, So all this is just to say that these fish are a huge problem, and like you were saying, Joe, fisheries managers and other people have been fighting their asses off to keep these fish from reaching the Great Lakes because everyone feels like that's that's the major tipping point. If they get there, the Great Lakes are just going to crash, and that's what we're all trying to stop. So for that reason, it is illegal to transport any Asian carpet in Wisconsin unless they have been gutted or had their guilt plates severed. Those stipulations were enacted because these fish can live for like a surprisingly long amount of time out of the water. I read some I read different numbers, but but over a day seems to be the consensus. Yeah, there's crazy. There's very similar rules out here for snakeheads. Same thing. You can transport them if it's like got its head cut off, because they can breathe there and yeah, same kind of deal. Yeah, And I mean what that What that means is like a fish might appear dead and it's been riding in a truck for hours, but theoretically it might still be capable of of surviving if it were to somehow get out and escape into a waterway. All right, So back to this arrest. Ping Lee is a wholesale fish dealer from Plattsville, Wisconsin, who now faces four misdemeanor counts of possessing illegal fish. Apparently, Mr Lee has been transporting Asian carp from central Illinois to fish markets in Chicago and Madison, sometimes as much as twenty hundred pounds at a time for at least the past three years. Wisconsin d n R has been working on a sting to catch this guy since two thousand eighteen, using undercover agents, covert surveillance, and GPS trackers. Suffice to say, Wisconsin is not messing around with the Asian carp thing. And and I applaud those efforts. To have to say, I'm honestly conflicted about this story. I know, I know where you're going, and I feel the same way. Yeah, because because like all right, one of the tools for dealing with the Asian carp infestation is through commercial harvest. Gill netters are now making a pretty good living in many places like Illinois and Tennessee, catching and selling tons and tons and tons of these invasive carp. Ryan Callahan did a great little segment about this on the Mediator YouTube channel that you should definitely check out. And cal actually brought some of the filets from that episode over to my house one night for dinner, and Joe, you were there, I was there. I ate it. I thought it was delicious. I was shocked. It was like it was it was truly delicious. It was not just tolerable. It was like really really good eating fish. It's it's the kind of fish that you could feed to people who say they don't really like fish, and then you can watch them after they take that first bite and they go, oh, that's actually good. Yeah, And it isn't that because a lot of these fish they filter feed verse common carpet grubbed the bottom, so people think carp have that mud taste, but that's not the way that these fish feet. It was a super mild, super mild. It wasn't like, oh my god, the flavor of this fish is phenomenal, but it's just a very sort of baseline good white meat fish exactly totally palatable. And and so my point in all this is that large scale harvest is one of the very few viable tools we have for trying to control these invasive fish. So that's something that I think we want to encourage, not discourage. And harvest only works if it's connected to an effective distribution network. And so that's why this Wisconsin arrest gives me some pause. I mean, it seems like like Mr Lee was clearly in violation of the law. I'm not arguing that his fish had their viscera and guilt plates intact, but he wasn't transporting live fish. It's not like he was smuggling carp into Wisconsin to start a fish farm. He was selling thousands and thousands of pounds of Asian carp for meat. That's just it. If he's if he has that much demand, he's selling that much fish, then good, then get out there and kill more to keep up with that demand. I mean, the law is the law, you know. I feel like the sting operation, like, couldn't we have gone to him and said, like we love what you're doing here, can you just make sure that you remove all the guilt plates and like just do it the right way. Yeah, And there there may be some things that I don't know about this story, but that's exactly how I feel. And it really seems from everything I could read, and I read a bunch of news stories on this, it seems like Wisconsin, Dina is trying to throw the book at this guy, and I think that might be a mistake. Like I think, if we're going to curb the populations of these fish through commercial gill netting, we need fish sellers that are willing to transport them. And I'm worried that this case might make people think twice about getting into the carp selling business. And then you can harvest all you want, but if you don't have a market, they don't go anywhere. I agree completely, And it kind of hearkens back to some stories from forget if it was the nineties, but there was a similar problem out here on the East Coast with the salmon fisheries. Guys would go over snagged their limit, catch their limit, fill these trucks and run him to sell them in New York City. And the way they stung them was they put black light die in the salmon eggs and then went down to New York City and black lit in the sushi restaurants and that's how they figured it out. But that's a that's a recreational fishery that's bringing a lot of money to town. I understand the staying and the undercover on that, but I couldn't agree more man Like, if you have people that are making a live and killing thousands of pounds of these fish, just I kind of disagree with the level of book throwing here. Yeah, so that was I'm torn on like, like I said, the guys clearly clearly he broke the law. Not arguing that, but I feel like these are the kind of actions we we kind of want to support, not this waye and and arresting him seems to have the opposite impact. If he's selling that many putting him out of business for this like ruining to the point where he can't operate, that alone leaves how many more Asian carp in the system, potentially just for his suppliers. So well, hey, by all means right in, let us know what you think, because we're torn on that one, and we'd love to hear from you, guys. Ah, this is this is perfect for me because you know Asian carp. It's like all Asian carp. You know, a good Asian carp is a dead carp over here. And we look at carp very differently in the US than they do across the pond in the UK. So I don't know if it's gonna hurt my win this week, but I do have a bit of an obituary here sadly, and this comes to us from the UK Sun. And I was stunned and wept when I read this headline. It says not carping on Angling World in mourning as Britain's biggest common carp dies aged And I said to myself, God, please tell me they're not talking about Tarka, because I've been following Tarka the carp since it's my space days tell you the truth. But at last my worst fears were realized from the story the Angling World is mourning the death of Britain's biggest known common carp. The whopper known as Tarka was aged about and wade sixty five pounds two ounces at its heaviest um. He died from natural causes in his lake at the Avenue Fishery in Shropshire, and anglers traveled from far and wide for the chance to catch Tarka, and Tarka's owner Rob Hale said there were numerous lucky enough anglers to catch him in the past and it has been amazing to follow the magnificent journey of his growth. Targa was introduced to the fishery in two thousand and eight when he weighed more than twenty pounds, and he was named Tarka after part of his tail was bitten off by an otter and um, I don't know, I don't know why. Maybe Tarka's an old British word for bitten by otter. Anyway, heart heartbroken anglers took the social media to pay tribute. Gary Roberts posted, so sad r I P. Tarca, What an incredible carp a legend. Luke Edwards, who caught Tarca when he weighed just under fifty three pounds, said, made me a very very happy angler and many more R I P. Tarka. Eric Cranston said this is so sad, unbelievable, stunning fish. To lose any fish is upsetting, but the jewel in the crown must hit everyone who has caught it and admired it. Um. And I actually have a good friend, Nigel Polsford over in the UK. Uh. The guy's utterly devoted to payle carp fishing. And I gave him a call just to see how he was feeling about this tragic news. And here's what he said. No, let me stop, you, let let me stop. You destroyed me mental stop. So clearly he was just too distraught to talk about it. Um. I hope he cat him on a bed day. You were friends. I don't know if I don't think that it was really upset right now, I should have given it a few days. Look, man, I'll say this no disrespect to British carpers, okay, because carping is serious business over there right It generates big dollars. And I love carp too. I think you do too. I've spent a lot of time carping, particularly on the fly, and I admire the passion of these guys that camp out all weekend under a tarp like waiting for a named fish to eat a boile and make a screen bivy yea. Um. But I just have to say, and like, pardon me, I'm happy, Like that's not my best or only option for freshwater fishing. You know what I'm saying. It makes me like I want to say, don't ever take for granted your land access, public lands, ability to hike miles of stream and hop guard rails, you know, drop your boat in hundreds of lakes. Yes, you know. And I mean I'm guilty of going on tangents about how they're like too many people out here now ruining spots, but it could be worse. You know. You can feel that same frustration at a lake you're paying harder and money to fish, trying to catch a carp so fat it can barely swim. So it's like, you know, that's what you got. I think it's I think it's it's very difficult to judge European carp fishing by American standards, and and we run the risk of being those obnoxious American assholes who were looking down our nose, of them being like, oh, those stupid Brits and their course fishing. I don't want to be that guy. I don't, but I am fascinated by the carp fishing scene kind of the same way that I'm fascinated by the tournament bass angling scene here. It's not something I want to do, but again, sociologically, god, it's interesting to me. I couldn't agree more. And and again I'm we're only having some fun here. I've actually done the eurocarp thing. I had a button got Yeah, he got very into it here in the States, and he had all the stuff, all the button no no bivvy, we had no tents, but all the bite alarms. You know. He would show up and bait the swim and all that stuff. And uh caught some some giant carp doing that. But I almost, you know, I almost feel bad because these guys are so into it on these lakes where these fish are just pounded and pounded and pounded. And I've I've heard European guys say that usually they don't fight very well, right, because they've been caught a bunch of times. Right, And then you come to the States and they catch a wild river carp or something here, and it's like, holy shit, you know, they fight these wild fish here fight so much more. So, you know, it's almost surprising that we're not like Destiny travel destination number one for this because you can go wherever the hell you want. There's carpet everywhere. They're probably a lot dumber than the carp over there, you know what I'm saying. Yeah, yeah, I mean it just it just also is emblematic of the different attitudes there and here about carp right here. People go out with bows and whack as many carpets as possibly can and kill them, and they're they're seeing a nuisance. We hate them over there. One carp dies and it makes national news right that they're so revered. And I think that's I think that's a pretty good way of kind of framing how are different culture fishing cultures look at carp right there? Well, what the story said, And I didn't drop this down, so I hope I'm not wrong, but I believe that it said that as big as Tarka was, it couldn't become a record fish because common carper not native there either. They only count the mirror carp in record standing. Huh, well, no carper native there. I don't want we're gonna get into a rabbit hole there. Let's not. Let's not go too far down that hole. But I mean you did sort of team me up there for my next story, Joe, because we're we're we're not on the happiest of news today, and I'm not I'm gonna kind of stick with not the happiest of news. Uh. I'm also gonna stick at least from my angle here with the angle of commercial fishing. I'm on the commercial fishing theme this week, okay, And honestly, man, I'm trying to find and a sliver of hope in all the news we read about crashing marine stocks and not great. But one of the many issues that marine fisheries face is illegal, unregulated catch. International harvest regulations are like super super complicated and contentious, and I am not going to dive into all that here because we don't have time, but just to quickly and vastly oversimplify, a U N treaty does exist between sixty six countries and the European Union regulating marine harvest at theoretically sustainable levels. Unfortunately, lots of fleets continue to operate illegally. Policing those fleets across global oceans just it's it's not feasible. There's there's too much water out there, Like, we can't police all the oceans. So one of the other ideas for curbing this destruction is to find ways of preventing the illegal fish from getting to the markets. Right, If the illicit fishermen can't sell their catch, they won't keep fishing illegally. Makes sense, yeah, right, But monitoring all the boats coming into international ports is also like a herculean task. So the folks at Pew Charitable Trusts just developed a new interactive tool to help port authorities and seafood buyers determine where illegal seafood is most likely to enter the markets. The tool uses data from automatic information systems, which are those electronic things that are on all boats now, and it focuses on the top nine global ports that receive the highest level of traffic from foreign vessels. But the thing is, like, there's my good news thing. But the thing is, this is just a tool that ports and seafood buyers can use if they choose to the existence of this time. There's no autation. This just came out right. Just having this tool doesn't do anything to curb or this way to illegal seafood trade, which currently brings in over twenty three billion dollars a year. Like, you're fighting up a lot of money there, I believe it. Yea. And in order for this to actually have any impact, the ports and the fish wholesalers need to use this information. They've got to actually turn away illegal vessels or refuse to buy their catch. And whether or not that happens, you know, it remains to be seen. My take is that this is a step in the right direction. It's it's not a solution, but I appreciate that this tool exists, and I hope people will start to implement some policies around it. But for my part, I just try to know as much about the origins of the fish I eat as possible. Preferably I are somebody I know catches it. Any fish I buy it a store is probably contributing to the problem, even if the packaging says wild cat. But that said still better than farm fish. So you know about all I can do. And I mean, dude, we could. Books have been written on the we can we can? You can get so lost in this debate and all the different different angles, and it is a great tool, and it is a step in the right direction. But if you if you step I can look at commercial fishing as a whole. It's just it just reeks of like a CAMAFIA operation. To me, it always has and that's what's so hard to penetrate. Like if you're not getting your fish for your restaurants more reputable source, but the price is right, it's like getting that many people to do the right thing. It really feels it feels impossible. It feels like almost impossible. Um. I'm not willing to go impossible, but I will say it's it's hard. And I like to when when I can think better, if people maybe having access to this tool, some some of the bigger seafood buyers and wholesalers and some of the big reports will we'll use it. We'll see. I want to be I want to be positive today, Joe. That's where I want to go. Well, I mean, the technology has to exist for anybody to use it at all, So so we will see. And I think, you know, I think there are a lot of operations out there that really do care about sustainable and care about wild caught. But um, you know, I guess it all depends on the volume and and what you need. It's just seems like such a tangled web. Know, and then if you start looking how this parlays into recreational fishing, it's a whole other rabbit hole. You know. I've heard organizations talk about recreational fluke limits as an example, but then they'll say, well, we don't have a good way to monitor the guys dragging for them. So it seems to me like until you have a good way to monitor that and know what they're doing with those fish, it's much harder to come down on the recreational guys. Like it's just the whole commercial scene. Man, it's just so it's so twisted. Yep, it's it's it's a hard one to balance out. And this is we're I mean, this is one kind of little story in a much bigger thing. Like you said, books have been written about it. But I'm hoping, I'm hoping we get something potentially positive out of this tool. Anyway, Well, let's what we're gonna We're gonna keep moving on in a positive direction. Even though I think this here's another story with the dead fish. I mean that just seems like we're just all we're all about dead fish today. We're all about fish death, uh in this in this news segment. But it's a feel good story even though there is death and Um, we actually first got tipped off to this one by listener Taylor Riggan. And uh, there's a bunch of sources out there. The one I'm pulling from here is from inforum dot com and the headline is Iowa man catches near record Minnesota muskie an unexpected place. So it goes a little something like this. It starts out the fish was so big. Brandon Gratick claims to have lost control of his bodily functions the first time he saw it. And here's a quote. It jumped one time. When he jumped, I saw him comma I in parentheses defecated. So we're gonna assume he said ship to the journalist. So when I saw him my ship, I literally did, he says, I really hope. That's one of the misuses of literal, like when people say literally but mean figuratively. Anyway, Yeah, I'm with you. So. Uh. The Iowa City, Iowa truck driver might have been exaggerating about his reaction to seeing his fish of a lifetime, but there is no need to exaggerate about the fish itself. Gratic landed a fifty two pound, fifty seven inch musk along and this was at the end of August from Straight Lake in Becker County near O s Age, Minnesota, and he was there on vacation. And this beast had a twenty five in girth, So that's a that's a massive musk. But there's there's a lot of interesting things going on with his story. Um, so he did keep the whopper, which died while in possession. It appears to be the Minnesota record for a non released muskie, and its measurements were within fractions of the state's catch and release mark. But here's here's where it starts to get interesting. Right, Um, there have never been any muskies stocked in Straight Lake, nor according to Minnesota DNR, have they ever gotten any in net studies in Straight Lake. And uh, what they say is that they believe that it jumped from a rearing pond located across the highway across thirty four from the lake. It jumped anyway, I'm gonna leave out go ahead, Yeah, I mean I don't. I don't think they're necessarily saying it jumped, but that's where they figure at some point it came from. So some other fun facts, right, the fish hit a two and a half inch long booyah. Crank bait that Graddic said he quote grabbed out of the bargain bin at Walmart because that, kids, is how you catch a big muskie. And I'm not kidding. I feel like a I feel like a broken record. You want to catch a musky target bass and and and cropp ease like this, dude, bin that's so good. Don't buy the lure by the two dollar bargain bin. Lure bargain all day. But on a down note, however, because Graddick was using super light line and a lighter outfit, the fight lasted thirty minutes and it kind of whooped the fish, which yeah, I mean that's gonna happen, hap me um. He also didn't have a big enough net, so landing must have been something he apparently squose it into, like a little trout sized net. I would love to see that me too, though obviously he did land it, because then, the story says, Graddick wanted to show his family the massive catch, so he called and told them to wait on the dock at the resort, about a fifteen minute boat ride away. The nearly five ft long fish didn't come close to fitting in his live well either, so Graddick just put the muski's head in the water and zip back to the dock. Put that whole dog and pony show together, and you've got a dead muskie. And while good on you for an amazing catch. As you can imagine, he's been catching some flak over that, though he says, don't worry, I plan to skin mount it. So there you go. Now, as crazy as this whole thing is, this is the piece that that really sticks with me. Um. I can't speak for everywhere, but particularly out here, like in Pennsylvania or I live, there are so many creeks and and warm water rivers and stuff that you know, everybody thinks that it's just rock bass and small mouth and pick roll and stuff. But at certain times a year, because of other trips that come in, it's like if you know where you're going, Like there's some big gas brown trout in this one in December that aren't actually supposed to be there. Like there's all sorts of little secret things like that out here. I don't know if it's the same in Montana, but that's what I think is so cool, you know, because it makes me wonder, did somebody else know there's some muskies in Straight Lake, you know, and for years have been like, no, there's not don't fish here, No, there's not. You know what I mean. I think that's I do. I do too, and uh, you know, it's one of those ones like I get why people are upset. That's poor fish handling, and the muskie community in particular gets way way serious about that stuff. So I'm you're not gonna I'm not gonna weigh on that. But if you're talking about a place, it's not like we're talking about Malax or Lake Saint Clair or Green Bay or one of those fisheries where muski hunters go to target their fish and those they want to have them there. It wasn't even supposed to be there. So I think that that has to be part of the conversation when you're weighing all this. You know, it's not it's not an optimal example of how you should handle the fish, but that happens sometimes. It's fishing, you know, and it's it's it's a little hard to blame the dude, right because the Minnesota record has stood since nineteen fifty seven from like Winnebagosh. So if that ends up taking it, man, how ironic is it in the Land of ten Thousand Lakes? It comes from the one that's not supposed to have them, you know what I mean? The irony in that is terrific. So maybe maybe we'll have some follow up on this one, you know, see it, see if he gets qualified. But yeah, he ain't gonna forget that one. So alright, Phil, you gotta you got a tough one this week. Man. Do you want to go with the lighthearted fun fish catching stories and fish dying stories? Are you gonna go with like the serious fisheries ecological level stories? What are you? What are you gonna pick? Buddy? We're all waiting with bated breath to find out. Did Miles Nulty bring in the most pressing fish stories this week? Yes? But did he bring in the most interesting fish stories this week? Also? Yes? Despite that, however, in memory of Tarka, I am crowding Joe Surmeli the winner. Joe, thank you for your tribute to legendary size kings this week. This does not mean, however, I want Fish News to turn into an awards show. In Memoriam Reel, people will expect us to get Selene Dion to sing Hollylujah over some black and white photos of dead fish. And we do not have Selene Dion in the budget. Maybe Sarah McLaughlin though. Anyway, all this death and sadness, I could use a stiff drink. I don't know about you. But instead of instead of hitting the the local corner bar, which would be easy, let's uh, let's head to Australia for this week's That's My Bar. Best god damn bar tender from tim Buck to to Portland, Maine the Portland argument for that matter. This week on That's My Bar, we're taking a really long imaginary flight to a place I'm not sure I'll ever be able to actually afford to fish. This may be as close as I ever get. But I must say it's cool to have a bar nomination from freaking Victoria, Australia. Right we Yes, we said we wanted to hear about bars all around the world, and listener Josh Carpenter delivered with this gem. Okay, and Josh writes, when you talked about the best fishing bars in the world, I immediately thought of the Bem River Hotel in East Gippsland area of Australia. The entire township has a total of two stores, the Bem River Hotel and a tackle shop. Why do I not live there? Um, he says, that's the kind of place it is. The Bem River Hotel comes with all the startup requisites for a fishing bar, forty year old carpet, dusty skin mounts on every wall, a large stainless steel trough instead of urinals, a golden retriever that has warner groove into the floor laying next to the door, and monochrome photos of two men standing next to a hundred dead fish on the ground from the good old days. But if that's not enough, Okay, there's more. There is more. I'm already sold man, you retriever on the floor, he says. What makes the place really special, though, is that whenever fishing tournaments come through town, they will extend trading hours and employ extra local people to accommodate the anglers. They will cook bacon and egg rolls and make coffee at five am, and then serve booze as late as the anglers will keep buying it. They also cook a mean feed of greasy chicken parmesans on a mountain of fries to fuel anglers all of this even though they are the only place you could possibly go within sixty miles, and he says plenty of other bars on the tournament trail won't even keep the kitchen open ten minutes longer than normal. That's how you nominate a place, no doubt that. I mean que the applause. That's not only does that sound like an amazing place, but that guy did a fantastic job of describing it. So to him as well, Josh from Australia, we brother and I I love this And the most striking and educational thing for me is that I had no ideas the Ausea's eight chicken palm. Oh yeah, man, everybody eats chicken palm. Come on, see, like who would have thunks? Like? That's that's what I expect to hear from a nomination of a bar where like the party boats dock in Brooklyn. Yea, they got the fresh Pepper's little Gobbagle, not Australia. That should have been like kangaroo Cobab's and deep fried Yabbies or something. Anyway, don't do not talk smack on kangaroo meat. It is delicious and I'm not joking right now. I I think Josh will probably back me up on this. Josh, Kangaroo's delicious. Don't anybody tell you different. Josh. You can, you can write back in it and back Miles up on that. But I have a message for you, man Um. I look this place up. Super cool, divy bar meets store, convenience store with a boat ramp. It's right in the bay. But dude, I have some bad news. Per the BEM website, the joints for Saleman. So, Josh, if you have the financial means, maybe this is a sign that you need to purchase this joint and keep Bem's cranking so Miles and I can come visit you and drink there. Someday. Maybe we take up a collection, we turn it into bents. It's our, It's our, our flagship headquarters outside of the US. Let's get the stickers and T shirts going before we start buying buying water and holes. Anyway, we've been enjoying all your bar nominations, so please keep those coming. We appreciate your help so much. Keep firing them off to Bent at the meat Eater dot com so we can keep this list growing and give your local hangs some love. Be honest, with you, man, I just want to know more about Australian fishing tournaments. You know, like we've covered the fact that neither one of us is big into tournament fishing, at least, you know, not the way it's done here in the States. But I gotta imagine the Aussees do it up eat down there, you know what I mean? I would think so like I mean, they seem to have a lot of stuff dial when it comes to fishing, because they have, they have so much good fishing and so many cool fish in Australia. But I have no idea, like what's their tournament fish? What is it that they are tournament? Is it baron Mundy? Is it Murray cod? Is it Australian bass? I don't know, Josh. If you're still listening, fill us in. We are ignorant about your tournament targets down there, but we like learning stuff also, so we have a listener at least one listener in Australia. So that's pretty cool. That could equate to one couch we could sleep on if if we needed to. But yeah, Josh, let us know, because you know, the bar you mentioned is coastal, so if it's a saltwater tournament. It's even more interesting, like what what do you guys? What do you guys target? What do you know? And they do have very cool fish there, so I've heard. I've never fished there myself because I have offensive it is I have, Well, yeah, my I should clarify that that my wife works for an Australian organization, so so she gets to go down or used to be able to go down there back when we could travel a lot, doesn't she she's she's all about those quantum miles. She just rides in the pouch um. I the one time I did get the fish out there, I think I caught the world's smallest murray cod. But those are super cool fish. And if you don't know about him, we'll we'll cover him here at some point because I've I've written about them before and I loved hanging out in Australia. Uh And just a quick tip for other Americans who may go there. I made some poor footwear choices, but you shouldn't bring snake boots. All the Ausse's wear snake boots and running through the bush in shorts and flip flops and the mill of the night is a good way to die. So pro tip for you. I sense that there's a deeper backstory there that either I don't know there's it's a long story. We're gonna have to tell that one in the time. Short version is they have these things called brown snakes. They will kill people very quickly. Uh. I think I only avoided getting bitten through sheer luck and ignorance straight up. Like, hey man, however, whatever it takes to stay safe, sheer luck and ignorance, that was sometimes anyway. For all the fascinating and fun fish they have in oz and there are a lot of them, one fish that they don't have our gar And if you're one of the outcasts like me in the Pro Guard fishing camp, listen up because this week's tackle hack comes from our good friend Alvin Dado in Texas, and he's gonna pass along a sweet little nugget for how you can catch more of them cars. I'm getting hats coming from inside the city like the flood at. Today's tackle hack comes to us from renowned fishing guide from all over the West, Alvin Dado. Alvin, how are you man, I'm fantestic, How are you? I'm also fantastic thank you. And you uh, I mean, dude, you you got it all over the place. You've done fresh, you've done salt, you've done rivers, you've done lakes like you just you do it all right, that's right, all waters man. So ask someone who who has guided and fished just about every kind of fishing there is. We brought you here to give us one of your favorite tips on fish and give us your tackle. Hack man, what do you got? All right? I'm calling this one the guard attachment. So it is an attachment that you can put on your hook, whether it's a fly or spinner, a plug, whatever, that will allow you to catch some gr Guar are known for having very bony mouths, and it's hard to get a hook in the small hooks, big hooks, doesn't really matter, but if you really want to give them, what you need is a guard attachment. And the guard attachment is a piece of nylon rope maybe two inches long. You burn one end so it doesn't fray, and then you take the other end and fray it out. Now, the important part is that you make a pretty good sized chunk of burned rope one end, because what you're gonna do is poke your hook through that burned section of the rope, and that'll keep it on there, so you don't have to tie it on. You don't have to make a fly, you don't have to make a lure with it on there. You just got a little piece of rope that's ready to stick on your hook when you want to get a car. And the way it works is gar have barbed teeth, so their teeth are designed to grab stuff and hold. They're not designed for cutting. So what happens when the guar grabs the yarn, the barbs and their teeth get tangled up. And what you gotta do is you gotta let them take it for a little bit. So let them run with it for a little bit before you set the hook. Even though you're not really setting the hook, you're just getting the line tight. The teeth are tangled up, and it works really well. Now, the thing about it is, uh, especially if you want to catch a guard to eat, it's a really good technique. But if you're trying to catch gar and release them, bring some gloves and some ly and some long dose fliers because you're gonna have to You're gonna have to untang will be guard attachment from the guard's teeth. If you want to return the guard to the water, if you want to keep the guard and eat it, you're all good. Whack them on the head and yank it out and throw them in the cooler. So I always have a guard attachment with you so you can get you some car. If this wasn't if this was an infomercial, I'd order twelve already right now. That's Monday, Sunday Sunday. Guard Gargard just happened. I just happened to be setting up a website that y'all can go to www dot guard attachment dot net. Because when you got the guar attachments, you don't need no net. I know that guard that's kind of like a niche fish, But that is a solid bit of wisdom right there. If you're into those, it shouldn't be a niche fish. I'm just saying, should should guard are so fun and and that's a good tip. I particularly if you're a little curious about the guards. I want to figure it out that I'm telling you. That's a good tip. I've seen Alvin use that successfully. And and if anybody out there watched season one of Doss Boat You might recognize that little maneuver because after after Jesse Griffith farmed like ten gar on spinner baits and clousers. Because just like the hooked wooden stick, Alvin rigged up that guard attachment and Jesse promptly got it done. It worked, It worked a charm man. It's a secret weapon, secret weapon of all good gar anglers. Cheap ass nylon rope. It is not just for tying off that mintor bucket. No, no, no, it is. It is a tool of of many, many uses. We don't have time to list all the different things you should be doing with your ends of nylon rope because we are coming to the end. But before we go, Joe is going to tell you about a bait with possibly the coolest name of all time in this week's end of the line. Well it's not loud enough. Nomad Design Tackle is an Australian based company that specializes in creating lords that will fool and stand up to big bad blue water brawlers like Tuna and Giant trivollis. Now given that the Aussies have a testing ground with much cooler ship to test on, like those GTS and dog Tooth tunas. It's no wonder that Nomad's wears have infiltrated the US market, coveted by those like me infatuated with casting not trolling for bad as pelagic species. Nomad makes all kinds of cool stuff, But I'm gonna go on record right now and say there is no offering finer than the popper they released in two thousand and eighteen called the Chug Norris. Now here's the thing, right, I've never fished a Chuck Norris. I don't even own a Chuck Norris. I've held at Chuck Norris in my hands several times at various tackle shops. I've debated the Chuck Norris, and each time I've decided I couldn't bring myself to drop thirty five smackers on a popper I don't really need. Now, to be clear, I'm not saying that Chuck Norris isn't worth that kind of money. It's extremely well made, tough as nails, and supposedly has design elements that allow it to throw a ton of water while being easier to work than other similar offshore poppers. But the thing is, as much as I love throwing poppers at tuna and dolphin. I only get to do it a handful of times this season if I'm lucky, and it's been my experience that when you're dealing with a school of hungry boiling tuna or a bulldolphin hovering under some flots um, if they're fired up enough to eat a popper, it don't matter if it's a madman as thorn, t popper, pro popper, jet popper, bullpop, tuna rocket or tun a hunter. And I have plenty of all of those, which essentially means I only want to buy a Chuck Norris because it's called the Chuck Norris, which brings us to why I've included this lure that I've never actually thrown. In end of the line, I distinctly recall walking up on the Nomad booth at eye Cast, which is the big tackle industry trade show back in seeing the sign reading Chuck Norris and swooning as I remember, I had to brace myself on the table of a man selling beer koozies that had led lights in them and coolers that featured built in deep fat friars. It was and still remains the best god damn lure name I've ever heard it's worthy of owning and throwing. Just so you can include the words Chuck Norris in your Instagram posts. Think of the witty pop culture e possibilities. Chuck Norris doesn't shower, He only takes blood baths. When Chuck Norris does division, there are no remainders. There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live. And for those of you that travel to fish, keep Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now the islands in your back pocket. Don't worry, all you Middle America listeners that have no use for a seven inch popper. They can tackle of fish as big and heavy as your lawn tractor. Nomad also makes three point seven five inch Chuck Norris models, which would probably catch some muskies or some some hog large mouths. Uh. And that said, though, you know, for a time there was even an itty bitty two inch freshwater Chuck Norris that featured patterns like frog and crayfish, but it appears to be discontinued, probably because y'all are doing just fine with your pop bars and hula poppers. But my pop bar came in contact with the coronavirus. Now the coronavirus is quarantining for two weeks, just doesn't have the same ring. Well that's it for this week. Hopefully you now know how to tell when a Canadian is making fun of you, why you should never ever leave a newlywed couple in your boat alone for more than ten minutes, no matter how old they are, and why Joe always carries a bag of nine on rope soaked in bacon grease in his front pocket. I do. And if you have crafted any of your own bacon grease tricks, please tell us about them. Email us at bent at the meat eater dot com. We always appreciate hearing from you guys, even if you're just writing in to tell us what we can do better. Absolutely, and if you are digging the show, please let the world know. Give us some stars, leave us a review, or better yet, tell your friends. We won't ask you for money like those NPR jumps, but we will continue asking for your help getting the word out because that's what allows us to have jobs. I mean, if you're assuming you can call this a job, it could be worse too. We could be restocking the air purifiers at the sharper Image over there, they're selling like hotcakes. I hear. Anyway, sharp Image still exists, Yeah, I think at least maybe anyway, And so next time, make sure your coffee is black rifle, and make sure you check your whole for that drain plug. Hey, do you guys remember bonus tracks hidden secret tracks at the end of a CD. Sometimes they'd be like track four thousand, or you had to listen for like five minutes after the last song. If you stuck around this long, you're about to get a bonus track. Because, as it turns out, river Horse from our Sage Lee Wisdom with river Horse segment in the last episode had not actually listened to our podcast before recording that, and apparently now he has a much better sense of what we're doing. No, the whole thing. River Horse came on because I called him and said, hey man, we'd like to get you on our podcast. But apparently he never did his due diligence and didn't know what he was contributing to. So after he actually listened to the show, he sent us this voice message that we are now going to play for you as a little bonus. And Joe Way, oh yes, yes, and hell Yes, what a fine, fine, superfine riff of a podcast. Boys, honor to be on there with you. Now I see what kind of party it is. I'm gonna pull out all the stops on the next one. Get ready for a throw down, a full on fight on the playground. Baby, But let's have a little chat Joe and Miles in my lord, how come I can't be the Cherokee Viking love child of James Harrold Jones and Fabio, or perhaps the tree hugger Texas fly fishing hid been Morgan Freeman. M hmm, Now that I think about it, the in your reference makes me feel kind of prom nights sexy. Oh thanks again for having me along for that, Red, And I'm gonna whisper sweet nothings in your ears, some pisty flow spulling t

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